About the Rat

Rat is a Mechanical Engineer who angrily attends the University of Southern LeRat. He hates Mechanical Engineering, but he still takes it. He’s failed every class, including Ratulus, Ratnamics, and Ratchanics of Materials. Rat doesn’t care. He hands in tests without taking them, but if the teacher is lucky, Rat will smear his poop on the part that says "name". Rat knows R’s are good. R is the angriest letter in the word angry. Rat fucking hates school. He has no friends because everyone else is way too happy or just a dork. If you’re a dork, Rat will bite your ears and scratch out your fucking eyes. That’s just the way he is. You think you like Rat? You think you’re a lot like him? YOU’RE NOT. You are an insignificant piece of shit that means nothing to the Rat. His angriness makes you look like a fucking hippy. Some people offer Rat jobs. Some people think he should mail out resumes. Well Rat doesn’t want a fucking job. Rat hates jobs, he hates working. You think you don’t like Rat? You think he’s too full of hatred? You think that I say "hate" and "angry" way too much? GOOD. Rat wants you to hate him. Fuck off. Rat hates you too.



Update on the Rat:

Rat has now graduated from the University of Southern LeRat. He recieved more R's than anyone, EVER. But he was still angry because Diploma's are RUBBISH, especially because they are supposed to make you smart when you get them but it sure didn't work. Rat then got a job for no reason, and nobody even looked at his rubbish diploma or his angry R's. This so called job was in Shitaly. "Oooh", you might say, "Shitaly is a wonderful country, I am happy for the Rat! He must have been so excited." SHUT THE FUCK UP. Need I not remind you that Rat HATES your happy hippy talk, and Rat is NEVER excited or happy, and if he was he sure wouldn't ever tell you because he hates you even more than he hates feelings. Well anyway, let me respond to your question. Rat HATES Shitaly. If you think it is a pretty place with happy people drinking wine and eating pasta, you are WRONG. Everyone in Shitaly is angry, especially were Rat lives between Ratrino and Ratena and sometimes Ratzarra. You think that Rat would be happy because there are other angry people? Are you a FUCKING IDIOT?!?? How many times do I have to tell you that Rat is NEVER happy. If there are any things that make Rat angrier than Happy hippies like you, it's angry Shitalians. You think there's great food for the Rat? Sure there's lots of cheese, but Rat likes Cheddar- the angry yellow cheese, and there sure is no cheddar... And Rat hates pasta, and he has to eat it every day. And Rat will chew off your ears and slaughter you if you even TRY to say that Shitaly has good bread. One thing Rat thought about doing was to go to the south, because he heard it is really like the Angry Shitaly he imagined, complete with Mafia. But Rat would rather stay here and help improve his angriness. He is so angry he could explode, and that is where the Rat feels at home.

Rat's Job is even worse than the rest of his life. He works for FiRat, they make Ratmobiles. If he even reads about his job he will kill me, because that's how angry it makes him. I am lucky he hasn't killed me already, and he doesn't because he likes being angry. But even Rats have thier limits.




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